X-Force X-Plained

X-Force #1, pages 14-15

Comic

Note: In the original comic book, these panels were horizontally laid-out. This means that you had to rotate the comic book to read them. It's stupid, and it also makes scanning it harder.

The main thing that I love about this GIANT page is that Stryfe is... pure Liefeld. First, take a look at his helmet. It's nonsense. It's impossibly ornate, and looks like a shitty Galactus or something. Beyond the stupid flaps coming out of it everywhere, the helmet has furrowed eyebrows. That's not ordinary stupidity. It takes a special kind of inverse genius to conceive of something that dumb.

Moving lower, the cape is... flapping around, rising and then falling straight down. I can't imagine what bizarre freak occurance of wind would cause that. Of course, it doesn't really matter, since every single character Rob Liefeld draws apparently has the power to fart constantly, since their capes always flow out directly behind them. It's particularly unnerving when they're standing facing each other, and their capes billow out in opposite directions.

People thought that the Bat-Nipples in Batman & Robin were bad. Look at Stryfe. Not only does he have four metallic nipples on his outfit, but they speak (check the "indeed you do, Cable" bubble's tail). Also, his pecs are absurdly high on his body. His obliques are ludicrously exaggerated, his shoulders are uneven and heavily spiked, his arms somehow drop straight down without any kind of socket attached to the torso, he has metallic armor that emphasizes his pecs (again, kind like 90s Batman movies), he's got an ENORMOUS crotch plate...

...but his left thigh isn't coming out of his crotch, or anywhere near it. Seriously, what the fuck? Stryfe's left leg comes from nowhere, and ends... with the foot resting on a panel boundary. It's not resting on anything else, by the way--see panel 3. Rob Liefeld, what the hell is this shitty layout?

His right knee is a hideous mess, he's got really stupid boots on, and his feet are tiny. All-in-all, quality Liefeld. And that about sums up the page...

OH GOD WHAT THE FUCK IS THUMBELINA, JESUS CHRIST KILL ME NOW



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